Obruo

… YTMND, but well worth watching especially if you remember the original “We didn’t start the fire” by Billy Joel

I’ll toss the lyrics here too for the curious:
We didn’t start this Website (by: NeomatrixCTL & Freedrosie)

Harry Potter, Domo-Kun, Ridge Racer, Sailor Moon,
Stephen Colbert, Captain Picard, Attack of the Show.
Technologic, Curb Stomp, New Orleans, Falling Thwomp,
Bell Peppers, Brian Peppers, Myspace is Emo!

Captain Kirk, Oh Snap, Bill Cosby, It’s a Trap,
Connery, O RLY?, Katamari Damacy,
Cuppycake Gumdrop, Spinnaz never gonna stop,
Butterfinger, Lex Luthor, Screw YOU Scientology!

We didn’t start this Website,
It was always twisted,
Since the site’s existed,
We didn’t start this Website,
No we didn’t code it,
But we’re gonna vote it!

Had one weakness, Third Reich, Zelda, Nigga stole my bike,
Lindsay Lohan, Sonic, Hassan, NEDM,
Joshcube, Camping noob, Internet’s a big tube,
Hax, Max, Horsedick, Stapler, Tiny Tim!

What is Love, Dew Army, Safety isn’t guarenteed,
VinnyWeapons, CloudSong, Mastersitsu, Donkey Kong,
Conan, Cyberman, AsiaCopter, GMan,
Dinghis Kahn, Pokemon, People raiding eBaum!

We didn’t start the Website,
Though we didn’t start it,
Made it look retarded,
We didn’t start this Website,
No we’re not the smartest,
But We’re still called artists!

Willy Wonka, Virgin Nerd, Didn’t say the magic word,
Best day ever, Michael Moor, Holy crap a Dinosaur,
Spiderman, Barrel Roll, Batman Stares into your soul,
Had it with these F’n snakes, Punch the keys for gods sake!

Darth Vader, Bill Nye, Razor Gator, Homer, Pi,
Lazy Town, Gay Fuel Pride, Syncan’s gonna break my stride,
Eon8, Soylent Green, Never ending ball machine,
Shoe on Head, Violin, Stingray killed Steve Irwin!

We didn’t start the website,
We may be inventive,
But we’re not attentive,
We didn’t start the website,
No we didn’t make it,
But we’re here to break it!

PS3 vs Wii, 64 and DBZ, Russia, A-Ha, World of Warcraft drama,
Very Greedy Sea Gull, Chunk is Indestructible, Burger King,
Racial Slur, Pranking Telemarketer, Chuck Norris, Chocolate,
Jesus and a Fishbiscuit, Kool-Aid, not Afraid, Dr.Leet is getting laid!

We didn’t star the Website,
They may call us losers,
but there’s lots of users,
We didn’t start this website,
Much more than a blog,
Cause we’re the men now dog,
now dog (repeat)

Edit: The history and CORRECT lyrics ;) … Unfortunately this site didn’t exist when I sat down and listened to this three thousand fucking times :P

Gaming, General Stuff, Music, Politics, Religion, Sex, Shadus Ramblings, Technology, The Funny

[Shadus Edit: The original story is available from here Elisan said a guildmate wrote it and she had permission to repost, but I figured I'd put the original in the story none-the-less.]

THEY’RE MADE OUT OF MEAT by Terry Bisson (Reposted with Permission)

“They’re made out of meat.”

“Meat?”

“Meat. They’re made out of meat.”

“Meat?”

“There’s no doubt about it. We picked up several from different parts of the planet, took them aboard our recon vessels, and probed them all the way through. They’re completely meat.”

“That’s impossible. What about the radio signals? The messages to the stars?”

“They use the radio waves to talk, but the signals don’t come from them. The signals come from machines.”

“So who made the machines? That’s who we want to contact.”

“They made the machines. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. Meat made the machines.”

“That’s ridiculous. How can meat make a machine? You’re asking me to believe in sentient meat.”

“I’m not asking you, I’m telling you. These creatures are the only sentient race in that sector and they’re made out of meat.”

“Maybe they’re like the orfolei. You know, a carbon-based intelligence that goes through a meat stage.”

“Nope. They’re born meat and they die meat. We studied them for several of their life spans, which didn’t take long. Do you have any idea what’s the life span of meat?”

“Spare me. Okay, maybe they’re only part meat. You know, like the weddilei. A meat head with an electron plasma brain inside.”

“Nope. We thought of that, since they do have meat heads, like the weddilei. But I told you, we probed them. They’re meat all the way through.”

“No brain?”

“Oh, there’s a brain all right. It’s just that the brain is made out of meat! That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.”

“So … what does the thinking?”

“You’re not understanding, are you? You’re refusing to deal with what I’m telling you. The brain does the thinking. The meat.”

“Thinking meat! You’re asking me to believe in thinking meat!”

“Yes, thinking meat! Conscious meat! Loving meat. Dreaming meat. The meat is the whole deal! Are you beginning to get the picture or do I have to start all over?”

“Omigod. You’re serious then. They’re made out of meat.”

“Thank you. Finally. Yes. They are indeed made out of meat. And they’ve been trying to get in touch with us for almost a hundred of their years.”

“Omigod. So what does this meat have in mind?”

“First it wants to talk to us. Then I imagine it wants to explore the Universe, contact other sentiences, swap ideas and information. The usual.”

“We’re supposed to talk to meat.”

“That’s the idea. That’s the message they’re sending out by radio. ‘Hello. Anyone out there. Anybody home.’ That sort of thing.”

“They actually do talk, then. They use words, ideas, concepts?”
“Oh, yes. Except they do it with meat.”

“I thought you just told me they used radio.”

“They do, but what do you think is on the radio? Meat sounds. You know how when you slap or flap meat, it makes a noise? They talk by flapping their meat at each other. They can even sing by squirting air through their meat.”

“Omigod. Singing meat. This is altogether too much. So what do you advise?”

“Officially or unofficially?”

“Both.”

“Officially, we are required to contact, welcome and log in any and all sentient races or multibeings in this quadrant of the Universe, without prejudice, fear or favor. Unofficially, I advise that we erase the records and forget the whole thing.”

“I was hoping you would say that.”

“It seems harsh, but there is a limit. Do we really want to make contact with meat?”

“I agree one hundred percent. What’s there to say? ‘Hello, meat. How’s it going?’ But will this work? How many planets are we dealing with here?”

“Just one. They can travel to other planets in special meat containers, but they can’t live on them. And being meat, they can only travel through C space. Which limits them to the speed of light and makes the possibility of their ever making contact pretty slim. Infinitesimal, in fact.”

“So we just pretend there’s no one home in the Universe.”

“That’s it.”

“Cruel. But you said it yourself, who wants to meet meat? And the ones who have been aboard our vessels, the ones you probed? You’re sure they won’t remember?”

“They’ll be considered crackpots if they do. We went into their heads and smoothed out their meat so that we’re just a dream to them.”

“A dream to meat! How strangely appropriate, that we should be meat’s dream.”

“And we marked the entire sector unoccupied.”

“Good. Agreed, officially and unofficially. Case closed. Any others? Anyone interesting on that side of the galaxy?”

“Yes, a rather shy but sweet hydrogen core cluster intelligence in a class nine star in G445 zone. Was in contact two galactic rotations ago, wants to be friendly again.”

“They always come around.”

“And why not? Imagine how unbearably, how unutterably cold the Universe would be if one were all alone …”

the end

Elisan Ramblings, The Funny

… wtf. Are we as a society so freaked out and scared that we react to everything in a negative manner? Didn’t someone ask any of the commuters near the “bombs” if they were there yesterday… or the day before… or the day before that?

“Turner Broadcasting is expected to issue an apology for causing today’s series of bomb scares throughout Boston. A statement emailed to the Globe from Turner Broadcasting said: “The ‘packages’ in question are magnetic lights that pose no danger. They are part of an outdoor marketing campaign in 10 cities in support of Adult Swim’s animated television show Aqua Teen Hunger Force. They have been in place for two to three weeks in Boston, New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Atlanta, Seattle, Portland, Austin, San Francisco, and Philadelphia. Parent company Turner Broadcasting is in contact with local and federal law enforcement on the exact locations of the billboards. We regret that they were mistakenly thought to pose any danger.”

I’d be embarrassed if I were from Boston right now. The mayor should probably also issue an apology for running his mouth off before knowing what the situation really was.

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Politics, Shadus Ramblings, The Funny